I was in a relationship with Germaine Greer. I had been for 8 years. The first two were great. Then it became a relationship focused on life’s fundamentals of nesting and procreating. Somewhere I stopped being in love with her. I loved her like a sister or mate and enjoyed her companionship but the magic was gone, it had left like it always does for me. So we had the kids, Augie and Holy. Holly was not even one.
I had seen Ruby at work. We used to politely acknowledge each other in the tea room. She was the cutest thing about. And I felt my admiration reciprocated. Eventually we found some common ground to discuss; our kids. Then she was off; leaving to sort out her life. A messy separation (yippee!). She was gone. Sigh. But then, three months later she returned. Yay!
The polite enquiries about each other’s children resumed. She always forgot the names of mine and politely enquired and was reminded, remembering long enough for the chat.
Biopsy
Then one day in the kitchen I noticed she had lost her sparkle. She was down. What’s wrong I asked. I’m going in for a biopsy on my cervix she tells me. I felt suddenly crushed. How could this happen to such a young vibrant woman; and of course it tapped into my own loss of my birth mother through cervical cancer. She was going in the next day but the result wouldn’t be delivered until next week, when I was to be away in Wally World. Her appointment was the same day as our trip to see Princess Wally. I couldn’t get it out my mind. I even set my alarm to remind me so that I could send positive vibes on the day. I told her only that we’d be whooping it up on that day and wished her well.
On the day, she was in my thoughts and I tried to buy her something without Germaine catching on. I told her what I was doing but any expenses on others greater than a few token dollars was always excessive. So in frustration I just bought some chocolates featuring Wally’s Aussie animal mates.
When I returned to work it was a few days before I saw her. And when I did she had almost forgotten all about it. But was touched that I was concerned.
I dropped some of the chocky bars in her drawer one night thinking she’d twig given they were from Wally World. But I didn’t hear back from here. Sometime later she asked if it were me and said thanks.
The Eyes Have It
Now I should point out at this stage the most amazing thing about Ruby; her eyes! It wasn’t just the wonderful shape (almond?), or the incredible lashes that were so long and curled that I thought they must be fake or at least subject to a curling wand each morning. I’m not one for makeup and excessive female grooming but for these eyes I made an exception (though it turned out the lashes were a la natural, woohoo ) . But there was more, it wasn’t just the sparkle, and that they held more than a hint of mischief, it was not just the happiness that they radiated when she smiled (they lit up and blinded me). Nope, it was more. In her eyes I could see that this woman had lived, and some of it had been very hard. Her eyes begged to tell a story. I’m a big believer in the saying “the eyes are the windows on the soul” (this was to be later proven with a variety of results. Read on for that, it’s worth it)and I was enchanted.
So our friendship had progressed to another level, not friends as such but some kind of bond based on her brush with death (as it turns out during this time she had more than a brush with death, she had tried to give herself a complete new coat – an unsuccessful suicide attempt. Her most successful failure to date – only another 30 minutes and it would have been successful).
I remember one day I was having a particularly frustrating day and it was spilling out. I tried to see Gail Kelly but she wasn’t in, someone said something and I snapped and said some dumb shit in the open area in front of Gail’s office where Ruby sat. It was not a good look. I felt stupid and embarrassed and wanted to make amends to Ruby who had witnessed it. Unfortunately she sat next to Paula Harrogan, a floozy who thought that acting cute and offering the hint of sexual gratification could make up for her lack of ability (and good looks). So given she too had witnessed my outburst I had to be seen to do the right thing and approached them both with an apology. Of course my offer to Paula was curt but I said a bit more to Ruby. It was Game On I realised.
From there we would share happy banter and stupid small talk. But I couldn’t crack a big chat, plus too many people would be watching and they would see straight through me. (Why is that when am man talks to a woman there is the immediate assumption that something must be on between them? Probably because that is exactly what it was!)
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